I just need a few things to get you going. However, being elderly, its most likely its related to poor neurological functioning, mild dementia, etc. She lost her husband of 13 years back in late … My Elderly Mom Jealous, Passive-Aggressive Not rated yet My stepfather died last year, my mother is 81. AgingCare.com connects families who are caring for aging parents, spouses, or other elderly loved ones with the information and support they need to make informed caregiving decisions. Daddy was a Scot and no one can tell a story like a Scotsman in my opinion so I loved hearing them. How can I get her to stop? Even if I stopped her and told that she had told me that story at least 25 times, she would keep talking and tell me again. Once he seemed to realize I’m somewhere within the vicinity, he stopped. She isn't demanding or rude, she just loves to hear herself talk. It was the right thing to do, but it means there is now no escape from 'doing my duty'. Oh, she does it with a smile on her face and is completely oblivious to strongly worded requests to stop talking. What kind of illness is this? I moved into my parents' spare room in 2010 - to help Dad when my late mother was diagnosed with dementia. That’s why she has a smile on her face and doesn’t even notice that it’s irritating. These specialists may recommend a medication to calm her. I'm matching you with one of our specialists who will be calling you in the next few minutes. I use to work in a nursing home, when I was much younger. I remember years ago my deceased father always nipping it int he bud with her. Limited mobility and other age-related health issues can make it harder for an older hoarder to manage their behavior and hide the … We would give mom a small glass of red wine and she would calm down and sometimes take a little nap. If nothing is wrong with her mentally, maybe you can just tell her that it would be nice to let other people talk some, too?? Maybe you would have better luck than I, have you tried bringing it to her attention? My mothers has been putting me down, hitting me and sucking the life out of me since I was a young girl. I call her everyday and every day is at least one hour on the phone. I felt both sad and embarrassed for her but as much as I tried to bring this excessive complaining to her attention and explain how it effected others - she would just slip deeper into a pity party. If shes always been this way, it may be related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area. Mom the Barfly Not rated yet Hello, I am new to this, my first discussion so bear with me.My mother is 85 years old, to be 86 next month. I moved my mother away from an abusive boyfriend and made sure he couldn't track her. Yeah! Happy Thanksgiving!!! If she’s always been this way, it may be related to obsessive-compulsive disorder or something in that area. I moved from the northwest to Texas. My mother has been going through a rough time lately , my step-dad left - she never worked I was young and in college at the time so we couldn't afford to pay the rent there or anywhere else this was about 6 yes ago. Your mother is a thought-verbalizer. Ask the Psychologist provides direct access to qualified clinical psychologists ready to answer your questions. Hi! Originally published by Dr Joseph M Carver, PhD on July 31, 2007 and last reviewed or updated by Dr Greg Mulhauser, Managing Editor on January 13, 2011. https://askthepsych.com/atp/2007/07/31/elderly-mother-talking-constantly/. Would exhaustion be covered under the FMLA? You need to learn how to end a conversation. Has she always been that way? The first step is to decide what kind of care your beloved mother needs. She doesn’t do this to provide instructions, be irritating, or belittle. Daytime sleepiness may not be a symptom of a medical condition in some cases – maybe the person is just bored with life. They both text often and they’ve got Facebook accounts, which is to say that they are very much plugged-in. ... with my elderly mother living with me. I’m 29. Thanks! 24/7 care for two years now but daily duties for 7 years. How do you balance competing needs of aging parents, work and your spouse and kids? The doctor met with the patient and the family to explain all of this, and offered to enroll the patient into hospice so they could be maintained comfortably at home until they died. The night my grandmother died, my mother was with her and she said ‘oh Mabel you look just like my mother’ and peacefully died although suffering from bowel cancer. Can she remain at home? Warn visiting relatives and friends that this is part of her behavior. The assisted living is NOT helping. In speaking to them, I was told that she gave them minute, play-by-play instructions on such things as opening a file drawer or how to hang up the telephone. If she calls back, let it go to voicemail. My mother always talks about herself, never listens to others – and is turning friends against her She’s a terrible conversationalist, seizing any opportunity to dominate discussions. Some even asked me if I was their mother or if I had seen their mother.Now that I am older I think about my parents and childhood a lot and realize that my mother and father gave me unconditional love and that my childhood, even though we were poor, was … I am 63 and had to retire to take care of my 95 year old mother. Let me start off by saying I love my mother so much and would do anything I could for her. Neurologists often see this as an early or subtle sign of dementia or Alzheimer’s. Importantly, it’s not related to her feelings about you. Still, it’s not an easy topic to bring up—and many people aren’t doing so. By leaving things straightforward and easy to understand, they’re much more likely to be okay with something they would typically show a lot of resistance to.” – cuselleration, 10 Tips for When Elderly Parents Won't Listen, Colonial Home Care Services; Twitter: @ColonialCare. AgingCare.com does not provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment; or legal, or financial or any other professional services advice. I've read that old people tend to do this, it's actually a neurelogical thing from age, but in this case I feel it's more than that. Don’t take it personally. Why Losing a Parent Hurts So Much, ... and about one in 20 children aged 15 and younger have suffered the loss of one or both parents. now I'm 28 years old, married with no kids. She just does it! When that happens, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts. This question has been closed for answers. She has always been a very, very difficult person to deal with. Our material is not intended as a substitute for direct consultation with a qualified mental health professional. That would drive me crazy. She is as sharp as a tac, her doctor says she isn't even close to signs of dementia or alzheimers. Tell her you want to discuss something important, sit her down and tell her the constant chatter has got to stop. It turned out to be dementia. However, being elderly, it’s most likely it’s related to poor neurological functioning, mild dementia, etc. A number of my colleagues on PT have written about the difficulty some of us have either listening to … Mom thankfully just has some cognitive issues so we still can talk good with her. I have always spoken my mind. And only 30 percent have discussed how their parents will pay for care as they age. He is also beginning to suffer some hearing problems and experiencing forgetfulness. Should my mother seek assisted living or go into a nursing home? My mom on the other hand now complains incessantly, rarely letting anyone else talk and if someone tries to lighten up the conversation or change the subject she gets pissy and just starts back complaining where she left off. Blood thinners sometimes cause anemia (low red blood cell count), because they can make people prone to have small — or occasionally bigger — bleeds in their stomach or bowels. I don't get more in than a word or two, and don't want to because it sets her off on another tangent of something else to talk about I've gotten to the point where I time her talking and she will go on for 20-20 minutes before I even say one word. She got forced into retirement 20 years ago and most people at her job couldn’t stand her. One of the most emotionally complex and difficult things a person can experience is taking care of an elderly parent. I’m getting on in years. All family members are in agreement with this, avoiding her now, friends are avoiding her, because all she does is talk!! I recently spent time tending to my aging, widowed father, and thought I'd pass along these 15 points, each of which I found to be significantly helpful during this phase of my own life. But he was never rude or overbearing either. Why? It can be difficult being around an aging parent when you feel like a verbal punching bag. When that happens, she automatically verbalizes her thoughts. You can say something like "Okay, Mom, I've got another call coming in/I've got a pie in the oven/the UPS guy is here/I've got to wash my hair. It’s related to her loss of neurological abilities. 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